Be Your Own Life Coach Series: Examine yourself

When you go for an annual checkup, you receive a thorough examination. At the end of the physical, the doctor has listened to your lungs, checked your heart, and poked and prodded to ensure that your body is healthy as can be. To check any underlying causes, he or she may even draw a blood sample to send it away to identify any unseen problems. When you leave, there is often the assurance that everything is ok because a professional has checked you over. It would be unthinkable for most to not be seen by a doctor at least periodically.

Despite the fact that a routine examination is a good way to maintain proper health or to prevent potential diseases, this ideology has often not been considered in looking at our relational health. For some reason, the decisions we make in our dating relationships do not get examined until there are chronic issues. However, ignoring these early warning signs may cause us serious problems later in the relationship. Let’s examine a common example. A girl meets a guy or vice versa. The person may be cute and very charismatic, but there is something about the way we are treated that is troubling or disturbing. Even though our body is trying to tell us that something is wrong, our desire for love causes us to deny the truth. Then, a false image of who the person is or isn’t begins to take over. We ignore that small voice of how we are really feeling because of how that person sometimes makes us feel. However, the walking on eggshells increases over time. The honeymoon becomes less often and more infrequent. Unfortunately, these situations often do not end well, and at the least, you walk away with a broken heart.

For the responsible, there is a better option. When you meet someone, examine how you feel when you are together before you will consider them to be your boyfriend or girlfriend. Ask yourself the hard questions. Do they treat you well overall? Is their communication caring, supportive, and mutual respectful, or do you feel disempowered and controlled in the slightest? Remember that someone that will eventually love you later will begin the relationship off on a good foot. After interacting with your potential significant other, are you motivated to do your best, or is this person intimidated by your success? Deeply consider these things. Take a realistic temperature of the relationship and examine the evidence before your heart is invested and seduced by all of the emotion.

If you are honest with yourself, there will be real indicators if the relationship is healthy or not from the very beginning. Consequently, when your body starts to tell you the truth, don’t be reluctant to listen. If you have any doubts, then there is probably a reason for your feelings. Pay attention to what is happening on the inside; in other words, examine yourself.